In 2017 I was the victim of a date rape that almost killed me. It is now 2026 and I am still living with the after effects of this night and what followed. The reporting, the healing, the way the trajectory of my life changed and the way I had to find myself again. Piece by piece I am remembering who I really am and leaning into my faith. I have changed in some ways and others not so. There is nothing good to come of sexual violence; it is a soul shattering, heart wrenching, physically, mentally and emotionally impactful event for someone to experience.
The only choice I had was to survive.
In the intense period of isolation I experienced; I clung to the Lord and found small ways to heal everyday; until I eventually began to function more again.
Today as I reflect on that night; I am saddened by the reality of the jealousy that can permeate humans. Yes jealousy is normal to some extent we all experience it; but there is a kind of jealousy that is purely demonic. One that drives people to do things that are inherently evil like rape. There is a spiritual side to sexual violence. To want control and power over someone and cause immense pain intentionally comes from a darkened soul.
The Lord however can heal anyone. He can transform a darkened soul into one more connected to the Holy Spirit and the Lord Jesus; but it takes a willing person to repent of the evil they have done and truly mean it. Change of who they are must happen on a deep level so they operate from a more loving space.
Jealousy underpins alot of crimes, sin and evil.
Asking the Lord for healing from the spirit of extreme jealousy is also another way perpetrators can overcome evil by doing good. Leaning into prayer, reading the bible/listening to verses online and getting the proper psychological help.
We are all sinners but we are also all saints made right through the blood of Jesus. ANYONE including a rapist can come to the Lord and be healed but the interaction has to be genuine, true and real. My hope is that these people come to know the Lord, his love for all humans and seek a changed heart that is not driven by wickedness. However if they continue to choose the wicked path they are essentially sending themselves to Hell.To call on the name of Jesus with pure intention can bring even the most wicked to Christ.
As a victim/survivor I can say my life has been far more painful than what it needed to be.
I enter a new season of hope and love now focusing on what the Lord wants me to do and continued healing from what I never should have had to go through.
For those who struggle with abnormal jealousy; hoping you seek the Lord and ask him for help in overcoming this and get the help you need. The love of Christ is far greater than wickedness and we all have that choice to connect with it.
Wishing everyone a continued relationship and connection to Jesus.
Love is patient, Love is kind. 🙂